Thursday, October 25, 2012

For Millie: Put on a Happy Face, Dear!


300 million for all those sad people everywhere, even in the Disney-made 
happiest place on earth surrounded by 
angels, critters and many blooming possibilities.  
If you don't succeed, there is no one to blame.
 If you work hard enough, and
pray long enough, 
eat the right stuff, purchase the appropriate stuff
cultivate a can-do all attitude,
you can turn into a happy person 
and join all the other happy people on the merry-go-round of life.

If you can't  stand yourself, it's because you're concentrating on your suffering, not on your plan for redemption. 
You can't be seen in public this way. 
are not the right faces
for those who aim to go places.

And you know it!


  1. I was reminded lately of how many people suffer clinical depression and are too afraid to seek help; or worse, their family and friends are not encouraging them to get help, or their insurance does not cover mental health problems.
    Please, if you or a friend suffer from depression, get help.

  2. when did we begin to stand on our heads and think we were supposed to appear perfect and just what the heck is that? (was it during the 50's?) i was reading simone weil the other day on suffering. she writes: "I should not love my suffering because it's useful. I should love it because it is."

    also, "We should seek neither to escape suffering or to suffer less, but to remain untainted by suffering."

    i think there are a great many people who suffer depression and i agree, they need clinical help, but i also think there are a great many people out of touch with the truth that is is painful to be human, to be alive. until we accept that pain is a part of being human and alive we remain in sickness. it's difficult to always know the difference between the pain, clinical or societally imposed. perhaps if we stopped standing on our heads in a futile attempt of trying to appear perfect, whatever that is.


  3. rosaria, i think your poem opens an important dialogue. what is the goal to living? happiness? this should not be the answer.

    what do you think the answer should be, rosaria? and how do we move toward achieving it?


  4. What do you mean I can't be seen in public like this? I didn't know! I stand up in the church pulpit, at the podium for public presentations to City Council, and when being interviewed on television, and I didn't know I shouldn't be out in public. Just because I've lied with depression most of my life.

    Phantsy that, eh?

    But if you think you're going to stop me, well, think again. I am a tenacious Bear. I will continue to appear in public, depression and all.

    Note to Erin: As to the pain, in my case, the pain through which I go is me. In some cases it has absolutely brought me to a halt. Lots of people know my condition; lots don't. It doesn't matter to me. Society be damned on this one. I will simply live each day as well as I can, and be as creative and loving as I can (thought that may change from day to day, sometimes quite a bit). Because I believe the goal is to be creative and loving, as much as I can, in whatever shape I'm in.
    While I don't exactly love my suffering, I have learned to treat is as a companion, and we have learned to live with each other. Accommodate each other. I may not have reached the point of Simone Weil, but she's her and I'm me.
    I'm not mad at you Erin; you've raised a good point, and for that I thank you. You've just got me on a very tired day, with all its "challenges."
    Blessings and Bear hugs.

    1. Ah, make that "lived with depression," not "lied with depression." I warned you that today is a very tired day.

  5. Yes, we can only hope that life will teach us how to cope, day by day, and that we become more accepting of what life is all about.
    On the eve of a monster storm, who is worried about anything else?
    Be safe, everyone out there.
    Take precautions.

  6. Rosaria, this poem is stunning. I'm glad you posted it.

  7. This is quite thought provoking .. I have a dear friend who recently had to 'up' his antidepressants .. when we talked about it, he just laughed and said 'I'm trying to get back to my baseline depression.' Actually we both laughed a lot that day. I don't know the answer to your question, I do know that when I cycle in and out of different moods conceivably called depressive ... the feeling when I emerge is almost like a cleansing.